So, I tell myself I'm not super-nurse and I can't do it all. I think that is a healthy mantra to carry over to our real lives as well. I never thought that I'd be applying my nursing self care to my personal self care. I feel like my personal self care pre-dates my nursing career and is usually more developed. However, I really like thinking that it is a two way street. So just as I am not a super-nurse, I am also not super-woman or super-human.
Sometimes, just realizing something and being ok with it is the beginning. I like to think that I am kind to myself and I am doing the best that I can do. So having realistic work expectations, means I should really have realistic out-of-work expectations too. I do not want to come home from work and start my homework but it has to happen sometime. So I am not super-student, but I am doing the best I can do, when I can do it and that is just fine.
What other work self cares can I translate to my personal life. Building strong relationships I find to be a work self care, that I am good at in my personal life as well. However, this year it has been hard to give the same amount of energy to my friendships as I have much less free available time. So maybe prioritizing this will give me the extra nudge to not leave my friends out in the cold.
I had a funny practice in not getting really frustrated at work recently. A patient on our floor gave their nurse a $60 gift card to Tully's and told her to buy the whole floor coffee on her. This was really sweet, so the nurse gathered everyone's orders. She asked me what I wanted and I told her I was actually just about to head to Tully's downstairs. I had a student with me so she asked if the two of us wouldn't mind to fill the orders and carry them back upstairs. I told her I didn't mind at all. So me and Alex, the student head downstairs. We start filling the orders at Tully's, there were 13 coffees to be precise. It took awhile for each order to be written on each cup, so by the time we got to the end of the ordering, half of the coffees were already made. The cashier then rang up the order and I gave her the gift card. She proceeded to tell me that the gift card had no money on it! What was I supposed to do? They were mostly made and there was no gift money. So I paid for all 13 coffees with my own money. I was first really frustrated at the nurse who asked me to fill the order, I felt like it should be her going through this scenario, as it wasn't even my idea in the first place. Then I got annoyed at myself for not checking the gift card first. In the end we carried all 13 coffees upstairs and I explained to everyone what happened. I now have 13 people who want to buy me coffee, we'll see if it really happens. But, it was great practice in letting go of a situation that is kind of out of your control.
Navigating crazy situations is a skill I feel I have learned at work. Whether I am now a more patient or less patient person I think is debatable. This is a self-care skill that I think I have perfected at work and hopefully translates into my personal life as well.
Sup Sunny :)
ReplyDeleteYes, I would have to agree that work self-care and personal self-care should go hand n hand. Sometimes I feel that work self-care is easier, because things aren't as personal, therefore easier to not be so stressed out if things don't go exactly as planned. Yet sometimes it can be harder because, well working on an acute care floor is just plain stressful, and the relationship there can be stressful as well because you have to rely on other people as a team to get stuff done. Tonight, I had a secretary that was missing for a long periods of time. I had to answer 7 phone calls myself in a 15 minute span, and then tranfer those calls or get nurses, etc. That's part of my job, I know, but why I am do a task of the floor when someone hired on to do it at that time isn't there? Anywho...Just like your java debacle, I understand how it can get really frustrating. Be firm, get your java back!
May you be rich in coffee for the next month! Ugh. that is annoying! I agree with Jason that personal self care can be harder, at least for me, because I tend prioritize work over self. Like art. I think doing art has less priority than exercise does for me. They both seem so selfish when other things come up. I've heard repeatedly that one should book out time in your calendar for exercise, art, etc, and when someone asks you to do something like volunteer, favor, etc that one should really think about canceling those "appointments" with yourself. So, I try to say "I'm sorry, I can't, I'm busy" but I have a lot of failure around that. I really like your "doing the best I can do when I can do it" with school, I really need to be reminded of that desperately. I feel like I'm about to drop a hundred balls soon and it was really nice to read those words!
ReplyDeleteI can just picture that moment of a half dozen coffees on the counter and the card coming up empty. Bravo to you for not losing it, although I'm sure it would have been completely understandable it you had at that moment. I think part of your self care will be to call in all those coffee IOU's over the next couple months. I think it is always one thing to randomly do something nice for someone (because you saw a great t-shirt or a obscure kind of hot sauce for your spicy friend) it's quite another to be held hostage by a favor that you weren't really up for giving in the first place. I'm sure 13 coffees cost a chunk of money, and probably wouldn't have been the first thing you thought of, if you were going to bring a treat to the floor. So, over the next couple months, I think it's going to be important for you to call in those IOU's. "Hey Stephanie, I'm feeling a little worn down and would like to officially redeem my coffee IOU when you take your break. Please and thank you in advance." I think calling those in, will help you feel a little bit more in control, which is good for self care too.
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