Stories ! Live By

     My story begins in a shipyard in San Francisco called Pier 64 North. My family lived there for many years before I was born. My dad, Charlie was a ship welder who worked in the ship yards. My mom, Marsha was a women's clothing fashion designer. My older brother Sir, became a U.S. Marine turned logger.
     While it might sound bleak growing up in a shipyard it was actually full of stories and adventures that are deeply rooted in our family identity. We lived on waterfront property, had a sailboat in our front yard, and a beautiful view of the San Francisco Bay. We had two wonderful Labradors and two wonderful Golden Retrievers, who we trained to retrieve the newspapers from the front gates. One pigeon named Walter and two ducks named Disco and Daffy. We had tons of fresh fish brought in by fishing boats that would dock to unload their catch for the day and an interesting group of people who shared the pier with us.

     This is a picture of my parents and in the site of our former home (the painted floor delineates the different rooms), it is now turned into a public park and there is a bench sitting at the site where we used to live.
   
       Our life took a turn for the suburban when I was three years old. We left our shipyard and moved to Marin County just across the Golden Gate Bridge. We moved into a beautiful house in a sleepy little town called San Anselmo where I spent the rest of my growing up years.

       I feel like I got my work ethic from both my parents, but especially my dad. He would wake up every morning at 5am and go to work while the rest of the world slept. I always admired his ability to do the same job for 30+ years and be a stable provider for our family. I attribute my creativity to my mom. She can make anything with her hands (sheepskin boots are a favorite staple of hers) and is full of ideas. Hard work and stability have always been a large part of our family values and therefore I believe a large part of my self identity. I feel like I take pride in going to my job, being a reliable and capable employee. It gives me a sense of worth and contribution to the world around me.
 
       However, I never dreamt of becoming a nurse, never in my wildest dreams. I was a musician for the vast majority of my life and always assumed I would be a professional musician into adulthood. I'm a classically trained harpist, which is why I moved to Seattle in the first place. After I graduated high school I went to UW where I studied Harp Performance and graduated in 2007. A large part of my self story at that time was that I was artistic, not scientific. I felt very intelligent, just not in the usual hard sciences. However, this self story took a turn when on contemplating my future and what it might look like I thought I would take Anatomy and Physiology as one of my science credits towards my Music Degree. I thought if I did well I could become a nurse, and if I didn't well then we'd have to see. So I took the class and the lab and did incredibly well. Much to my self-esteem boost, I thought wow I am more capable than I gave myself credit for. Off I went into my nursing adventure...

Me as a harpist (in Japan 2002)

                                                     Me as a nurse at Virginia Mason 2012

         It has been a challenge for me assimilating my two identities together. I have always enjoyed the creative and thinking outside the norm (my harpist side), yet I am also reliable and intelligent (my nurse side). Sometimes I wish I was always type A RN because I feel like I would not have to figure out how to combine two life perspectives. Yet, I feel like there has to be the ideal nursing job out there for me. In my current job I work as a Cardiac Nurse on a busy floor, and while I love my job, I honestly cannot see doing it until I retire. I want to find the job as a nurse that really works for me. I keep believing that it is out there and until I figure out what it is I will keep up my current job.

        On a side note this is an artistic hobby that I adore... free-handing intricate pen and ink drawings. I think if you click on it, it can get clearer.

Goals

                                              Goals for moving forward                                   

1.     I want to explore what it takes to work as an RN abroad. A large part of my decision to become a Bachelor's educated Nurse was so I would take my practice internationally for at least a year. There are many countries across Europe, Africa, and the Southern Hemisphere where English is their primary language. This makes working and communicating with patients and doctor's more feasible. But then I have been thinking what are my options if I wanted to work in a non-English speaking country? Well, there are "American" hospitals based throughout the world and there are American military bases as well.

         I have also thought to explore what Travel Nursing Agencies there are that deal with international placement. This is something I know relatively nothing about, yet it has its perks. I want to delve into what agencies exist and how to get into contact with them. 

          While I would be up for travel nurse volunteering in my life, I really want to work internationally as an RN as well. I feel many parts of nursing translate around the globe. 1mL in the United States is the equivalent of 1mL in Botswana. However, the parts that differ will probably be the way care is delivered, the role of the RN in other countries, and working conditions. Travel expands your life when it is just for fun, and I think travel for work can also expand your working life.

2.     Goal number two is something that scares me at work and that I do not enjoy but should really explore deeper. This is the subject of "sheath pulls". As I work on a cardiac floor, we have many patients going to the cath lab. Upon returning to our floor, they most often still have the sheath in their groin. It is the responsibility of the resource nurse or charge nurse to pull the sheath. 

         There are so many variables that I find it somewhat overwhelming and do not enjoy it!!! However, I do not like thinking there is something at work that will always intimidate me. So I would like to jump in to explaining all the variables so as to learn it better myself. Some of the variables include which type of device to use to pull it, and which medications the patient got while in the cath lab and their various rules to follow. Yet there are many more variables and nuances that I would like to reflect on and improve my knowledge. Usually I find being afraid of something is just because you do not understand it. So rather than live in a world of avoidance, I look forward to the opportunity to delve deeper.

3.       Goal three I would like to reflect on self-care as nurse. It is a constant back and forth between caring for others and caring for yourself. I think reflecting and emphasizing the importance of self-care is a good priority to set when working as caregivers for other people. Specifically 5, fast-paced critically ill people.

          There is the age old wisdom that you are better at taking care of others when you have taken care of yourself. And while I feel like I do an OK job of looking out for my well being, there is always room for improvement. Currently my most loved self care strategies are long nights sleep and warm showers, but there is a world out there of what self-care entails. These tips can both improve my work-life balance but are also beneficial in all other life-... balances. 

           One of the benefits of being a 12hr shift RN is the amount of free time it allows you. While this currently is interrupted due to school, the rest of our lives we should take advantage of this gift and live our free time to the fullest. Enjoying your free time I believe is a strong element of self-care.

I believe these three goals align with things I have been contemplating recently in my own life. I love the opportunity to explore them deeper and share them with others.